My name is Laura, and I am in recovery…
Seven years ago I made the decision to live. I was beaten, broken and tired of the way that I was existing. And that is all I was doing…existing. I had no spirit, no self-respect, and no love for myself.
There were times throughout my active addiction that I would go for days without talking to another person. When alone, I would say something, anything, out loud just to make sure that I still had a voice. I also hurt a lot of people in my active addiction. When I was deep in the grips, I lost contact with my family and friends. My mother later told me that she feared she would eventually get the call to come down to the morgue to identify my body.
I had little or no hope that I would ever get clean. I thought that I was destined to live and die an active addict. I knew that it was time to make a decision.
When I finally chose to seek help, it was very difficult and frustrating. There weren’t many options for me considering I had no insurance or money to pay for treatment. I remember waiting for 2 ½ days in an emergency room only to be told that there wasn’t a bed available and that I would have to come back. I did leave….and I didn’t seek help for another 3 years. It took being arrested numerous times on drug related charges to finally get into a program.
The first few months in recovery were very difficult. I was learning how to live all over again. Eventually, I was able to reconnect with my family and through others telling their stories, my parents became aware that addiction is a disease. Ever since coming into recovery, my parents have been on my side one hundred percent. They understand that I am not a bad person but that I made bad decisions.
My hopes are that by telling my story, I can let others know that there is hope for even the worst addicts. I was lucky enough to find recovery and I want others who are in active addiction to have the same opportunity. Today, I have a beautiful life. I went from being homeless, addicted to drugs and having no hope to being a stand up woman, a mother, and living a successful life beyond my wildest dreams.
Being in recovery is not always easy. There are many stereotypes that go along with being an addict. But it’s expected. As addicts, we have burned many bridges and hurt many people. For me, the only way to move on is to do the next right thing. There is hope for all addicts…I am LIVING proof