My name is Jordan Stierle and I am in long term recovery. My last drink and drug was taken inside of my 20th institution on September 7th 2009 in Brentwood, NY. On that day I saw my truth.
I realized that I had no choice when, where or how I drugged. When the obsession to use came, I did what it told me to do. If I couldn’t stay clean in a rehab then I was never going to make it outside in “The real world.” It was in that hopeless moment I realized that something had to change.
I had been kicked out of other institutions for using. Suicide was a thought I often had but never committed to. I have used rain water to get high, shared needles, overdosed, lied, cheated, stole, and I was tired! What seemed like a wish was answered through the help of a few people I had met days after I made the decision to honestly ask for help. I don’t know why prayer seemed like the way out but at that moment it made sense. I was out of answers.
I started on a 12 step journey that would prove to myself and others that long term recovery was possible. I was told that I didn’t have to be looked at as a junky anymore and I didn’t have to hide as long as I did certain things in a certain way. My life started to get better and better everyday.
I realized I was full of fear and my life was ruled by a negative view of the world and myself. As time passed, I realized I had stopped counting days and that I was able to think and act in ways I had never been able to do before.
Reading and listening to people who had what I wanted began to be an everyday thing. I had found true FREEDOM. I was not governed by a drink or a drug anymore, I could go anywhere and do anything and I have been doing so ever since.
I thought when I first got into recovery that my life was over. I know now that it had just started. I have been on vacations all over the United States and I am free to do so as long as I live the 12 steps and bring the principals with me in everything I do.
Today, I have the ability to help people change and be an example of a way of life most people dream about. Instead of checking into rehabs and treatment centers, I go and share my story in hopes that someone will hear what I have been through, relate and decide to follow in my footsteps.
I have strong relationships and friendships today which is something I could have never imagined. The same people and places that kicked me out or banned me now welcome me with open arms. I have the ability to love and understand people like never before.
I owe what I have today to the knowledge of the people who came before me. It is because of them I have A LIFE WORTH LIVING .