I didn’t choose to be an addict. For many years I tried to escape from reality and the feelings associated with living life on life’s terms. I didn’t know how to cope so I turned to drugs and alcohol which quickly took over my world. I found myself spinning in a downward spiral leading towards a desolate bottomless pit.
From that miserable existence, I was led to find a new way and only by the grace of something much bigger than myself am I no longer the person I used to be. Today I am a person in long term recovery from a disease that tried to destroy me. Today I am a loving daughter, a devoted wife, a trusted employee and a student working towards my master’s degree. Today I am a productive member of society, experiencing life and all that life has to offer. I am accountable for all of my actions and am no longer running from reality.
Recovery has given me a second chance. As a using addict I accepted I would never amount to anything and I would probably die with a needle in my arm. Since coming into this process I no longer have that fatalistic point of view. I have been blessed with the opportunity to make it to the other side of that hopeless state of despair and in turn the dreams I once had for myself have been re-awakened.
Since beginning my journey into recovery almost 6 years ago, an amazing thing has happened; I learned to love myself. I no longer wish to hide from who I am or who I was, but rather I choose to stand up and be seen. The experiences I have had have made me who I am today, and I am so proud of that person today. I do not regret the past for I know that those events have made me a stronger, more tolerant, and more compassionate individual. Today I choose to embrace all of me; the good and the bad. Today, I am an example for others that we do recover. Today, because of recovery, I know that I am worth it.